Self Care 101: Take a Freakin’ Break

Self Care 101: Take a Freakin’ Break

Hey y’all,

Sometimes you just need to take a freakin’ break and that’s where I am with dating. It’s not that I had a negative dating experience or anything I just have SOOO much going on in my life right now that I need to get MYSELF together before I can even think of getting back in the dating game.

Make sure to check out 5 Tips for Preventing Dating Burnout to ensure that you are pacing yourselves in this crazy dating world.

What the heck is happening in the world of Dr. T?!

One of the biggest things that I have to get together is my health. I’m about 50% but would love to be 100% sooner rather than later. I understand I need to take it one day at a time. Hence, me taking a freakin’ break to adjust some things.  

One of the biggest health issues that has really gotten me down as of late is I’m severely Vitamin D deficient (anything under 20 ng/ml is considered deficient and my level was 9 ng/ml). Most people don’t know that they are deficient or think to have their Vitamin D levels checked. You will assume your symptoms are due to everything BUT your vitamin D levels. A few common risk factors are limited sun exposure and darker skin (that’s my life!), which means African Americans are at high risk! Common symptoms I experienced included fatigue and tiredness and depression.

Read here for additional signs and symptoms of Vitamin D deficiency.

Y’all I would be out of breath after walking up a flight of stairs. Also, I was tired all day even if I drank coffee. The kicker is that I often had to take naps after basic tasks such as showering. Do you know how annoying it is to want to clean and you can only do one thing every few hours?! How about trying to explain to your date why you have to sit down after walking around the park?

It was sooo much! I take a megadose of Vitamin D, which has helped; however, I still have to take frequent breaks and nap more frequently than normal.

Due to my extreme exhaustion, I’ve recognized I’ve been lacking in some other areas.

I’ve failed at living a healthy lifestyle. Everything has gone to crap –my healthy eating, physical activity, and getting quality sleep. Jesus halp!

I gotta get my life back together. With the Vitamin D deficiency for me, it was such a vicious cycle. For instance, I wanted to exercise and if I managed to do so I would be bedridden for at least 2 days following physical activity because my entire body would be in pain. And I’m not about the “I haven’t worked out in a while type of pain”, but chronic pain. This then resulted in me avoiding exercising and even leaving my house.

As far as food I barely had the energy to pick up food let alone cook. With the sleep, I was sleeping too much during the day and then trying to “catch up” on work in the evenings. That didn’t work too well.

My number one priority is to get my health back on track, so I can be the best version of myself for not just me but for my future bae.

As far as the depression, it literally hit me hard and out of nowhere. It was like one weekend I was celebrating my birthday in New Orleans and the next week I was barely getting out of bed. Depression is real. Make sure to take care of yourselves. When you are experiencing mental health symptoms, schedule routine appointments with your mental health provider AND your primary care provider. As you see in my case my physical health exacerbated my mental health symptoms. Once I started a medication regime and my weekly therapy appointments my symptoms have subsided.

Aside from my physical health issues  (Jesus I only named one thing I’m dealing with), I’m traveling for a month. Jesus send halp!

I was just in Charlotte, NC for Nate’s Family Reunion aka my daddy thought it was a good idea to name a family reunion after himself and not the family name.

It was tons of fun but super exhausting.

This week I’m visiting my mom and aunt in the country. If you were on live with me Monday then you heard the crickets in the background. LOL!

I have a few more things in store this month so make sure to tune to my Instagram for updates of the adventures of Dr. T!

The real question is what does my travels have to do with my dating break?

Well before I left I had just stopped dating two men. One for sure ghosted me and I guess the second kind of did too. Anywho, I’m not here for endless text messages over the course of a month. You know we don’t do that over here!

When will I resume dating?

Honestly, probably by the end of September. That will give me the opportunity to ensure that my health is back on track and give me time to get my life organized.


When things are happening it’s okay to take a freakin’ break. For me, I choose to take a break from dating, for you, you may need a break from other things in your life. Overall, you are no good to others if you don’t take care of yourself first.

Take Care,

Dr. T

P.S. I’m not taking a break from Dating While Degreed…this week. We still cooking up some cute-ish that’s dropping soon.

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